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"No Place To Hide [Episode 2] - The SilvaGunner Christmas Comeback Crisis" is a high quality lore video and the second episode of The SilvaGunner Christmas Comeback Crisis.

Summary[]

Following the events of "Seasonal Return", President Haltmann and The Voice Inside Your Head meet in The Voice's tower to discuss the news of Smol Nozomi's escape and subsequent detection by a figment-hunting Spheric. The Voice swears his revenge on Nozomi for his previous defeat, prompting Haltmann to be a little concerned. Haltmann then announces his latest creation: the Stringbot, a robot based on Green de la Bean designed to suppress riots in Grandiose City. The Voice is impressed by the Stringbot's power and approves production of the bots immediately. Before Haltmann leaves, The Voice rewards the entrepreneur-inventor by reminding him of his promise fulfill Haltmann's wish about his daughter.

Meanwhile, four hooded figures known as the Rapper's Union meet in their headquarters in an alley deep in the city to discuss their plans of overthrowing the Voice's tyranny. The Union's members (Snoop Dogg, Charles Barkley, Soulja Boy, and Chip tha Ripper) discuss their plan to retake the city and destroy the Voice's Spherics, then smoke weed before they begin their assault. Right outside their headquarters is Smol Nozomi, who is still being pursued by the Spheric. The Spheric corners her, but she short-circuits it in a puddle in the alley. A hatch atop the Spheric then opens, and Nozomi jumps inside.

Suddenly, the Spheric lights up with green light and transforms into the Smolitzers, gaining Nozomi's color scheme and appearance. Nozomi takes complete control of the mech, noting how she can pilot it instinctively, and uses it to easily dispatch a swarm of wandering Patrol-Bots. Nozomi then spies the Rapper's Union back in the alleyway. The Union breaks into the nearest building and threatens everyone inside. One citizen loyal to the Voice summons a Spheric, which the Union's guns do moot against. The Spheric returns fire and manages to break Soulja Boy's wrist with one of its lasers. When all hope seems lost, Smol Nozomi bursts into the building and utterly destroys the enemy Spheric with her Smolitzer. Nozomi greets the Union, whom she has worked with in the past, and then takes off to save her friends.

Track list[]

Time Track Source Usage / Note
0:05 - 0:40 "Loveless Command" Kirby Planet Robobot The Tower's theme.
0:42 - 1:24 "Apocalyptic Reboot" As Haltmann presents the blueprint of the Stringbot to The Voice.
1:31 - 2:58 "DND (Do Not Destroy) - No More Heroes" Triple-Q The Rapper's Union theme.
3:03 - 3:34 "Metal N. Vasion" Kirby Planet Robobot As Nozomi is cornered by the Spheric.
3:54 - 5:15 "Pink Ball Activate!" When Nozomi enters the Smolitzer and destroys the Patrol-Bots.
5:17 - 6:25 "It's A Mad World (Instrumental)" MadWorld When the Rapper's Union appears.
6:27 - 6:52 "Re: Green Greens" Kirby Planet Robobot As Nozomi defeats the Spheric attacking the Rapper's Union.
6:56 - 7:55 "Hold You Down (Instrumental)" DJ Khaled When Snoop and Nozomi have a conversation after the fight.

Transcript[]

To open the transcript, click "Expand".

[The video begins with a fade from black onto The Voice's tower.]

Meanwhile, in the tower...

[The scene transitions to showing President Haltmann and The Voice Inside Your Head meeting inside the tower.]

HaltmannVoice! The Patrol-Bots and Spherics have detected a loose Figment.

The VoiceBring up the screen...

[The scene shows Smol Nozomi being chased by a Spheric, as seen in "Seasonal Return".]

The screen revealed a picture of a Spheric chasing a smol figure.

The VoiceNozomi...! You were the bane of my existence just a few months ago. And I WILL have my revenge...

[The scene cuts back to Haltmann and The Voice.]

HaltmannAre you alright?

The VoiceHm? Yes, of course.

HaltmannHmm... anyway. I have been developing a new mass-production robot for crowd control. Would you care to see it?

The Voice walked up to Haltmann and observed the blueprint he was holding.

[The scene shows the blueprint for the Stringbot, containing the following text:]


[HARLEQUIN FORCE STRINGBOT]
[Designed by Max "Profitt" Haltmann]

[Offensive mecha designed for riot and crowd control, using sound-based attacks.]

[Mass-produced.]

["Bitch you guessed it!"]

[Front loaded speakers. Can emit sound within a 50m radius, goes through any material.]

[Rockets fold into rockets skates. Doubles as a method of flight, 24 hour fuel.]

[LED eyes]

[Scissor hands, for cutting.]

[If the Beanbot has failed its directive, it can repurpose itself into a missile and perform a kamikaze attack.]


HaltmannIt's called the Harlequin Force Stringbot, or Stringbot for short. Its purpose is to suppress rioters with the power of sound. It can also fly up to 24 hours. The Stringbot is deigned with all-natural renewable materials, making it a low-cost venture!

The VoiceInteresting... a great way to bring back the power of the bean. You have done well, Haltmann.

HaltmannThank you, Voice!

[The scene cuts back to Haltmann and The Voice.]

The VoiceI hereby authorize production of the Stringbots. Get these schematics to Angry Joe immediately.

HaltmannAffirmative.

Haltmann prepared to leave the office.

The Voice...Oh, and Haltmann? ...Do not think I have forgotten about your daughter. If you keep up the good work, I will grant you your wish.

Haltmann...

[The scene transitions to showing a dark alleyway deep within Grandiose City.]

Down in the city, in a dark alleyway...

a steel door stood tall, dimly lit by fluorescent lights.


[The scene cuts to the inside of the Rapper's Union's headquarters.]

Beyond the door was a small, dingy room, filled with smoke and empty bottles of alcohol. A large banner with a hand symbol was hung across the wall.

Four hooded figures were talking amongst themselves...


[The four Rapper's Union members appear, with their faces obscured by their hoods.]

???Ay yo, we be the Rapper's Union.

???The Voice be a gay nigga.

???This society we'll mend.

???We're ballers to the end.

???SLAM!

???May our flows be ill and our chains golden.

??? (All)Amen, brotha.

[The members of the Rapper's Union remove their hoods, revealing themselves to be Snoop Dogg, Charles Barkley, Soulja Boy, and Chip tha Ripper.]

???JAM!

???Heh... you said it, Barkley. Aight, Snoop Dogg comin atcha with this real ass shit. We need to expend our hood. We can't stuck in this dank-ass basement all fuckin' day.

???But Snoop, there be mothafuckin' robots in the other building!

Snoop DoggNo problem, Chip. In my scoutin' trips, I found ourselves some gats and .48s. We can take on thos metallic-ass niggas any day, shiit.

???I got one problem, mah nigga.

Snoop DoggSup withchu?

???I just broke my wrist, ay.

Snoop DoggWell that's yo own goddamn fault for bashin' on them steel drums all the fuckin time, "Soulja Boy". Ain't even livin up to yo name!

Soulja BoyAy, that's just how I cope.

ChipThat's just how he copes, man.

Snoop DoggWell cope this nigga. In 2 hours we be takin over the next buildin'. Bring yo popguns and yo pride. Fo shizzle. Soulja, use yo fuckin' mouth to shoot if yo have to. ...First the next buildin', then the block, then the whole city'll be our mothafuckin' oyster. Voice be damned. Barkley, what do you think?

BarkleySLAM!

Snoop DoggNow that's what I wanna mothafuckin hear! I'mma toke up before we take that shot over.

Snoop, Soulja Boy, Chip and Barkley all started to smoke weed before their huge assault.

[The scene cuts back to the alleyway, now with Nozomi being chased by the Spheric.]

Meanwhile, just outside... Nozomi was still being chased by the Spheric!

Nozomi had no means to defend herself...
she was too smol, so all she could do was run!

Nozomi ran into an alleyway, and... she was cornered!!
The Spheric closed in on Nozomi, while she tried to look for a way out...

Suddenly, Nozomi noticed a large exposed wre next to a puddle.
Of course⋯!

Nozomi jumped towards the wire, with the Spheric in pursuit.

Just as the Spheric was about to make its way across the puddle,
Nozomi grabbed the wire and threw it in!

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!


[The scene shows the deactivated Spheric on the ground, with a hatch atop its head open and emitting green light.]

The electricity short-circuited the Spheric. It shook violently,
and then slumped to the ground as its eye turned off.

The hatch atop its head opened...

Nozomi had this strange feeling... for some reason she felt like she had to jump inside the Spheric. But what would happen?

Putting aside her hesitation, Nozomi removed the wire from the puddle and hoped right inside.


[With a white flash and a shimmering sound effect, the scene shows Nozomi piloting the transformed Smolitzer.]

Suddenly, a bright green light burst from the Spheric!

The robot's color palette changed to purple, blue, and green,
which matched Nozomi' hairstyle.

The eye fell off the robot, and in its place, two LED eyes flickered on.
Nozomi looked at the control panel of the robot:

[SMOLITZER ACTIVATED. PILOT: NOZOMI TOJO.]

What was this power Nozomi felt? She had only just gotten into the robot,
but it was like she had piloted it for years!
Nozomi could move the robot's arms and legs just like her own!


[A Patrol-Bot suddenly appears and detects Nozomi.]

???FIGMENT DETECTED! TARGET: NOZOMI.

[The scene cuts back to the alleyway, now with Nozomi in her Smolitzer and several Patrol-Bots.]

Some flying robots spotted Nozomi in the alleyway!
Perhaps now was a good time to test what the Smolitzer could do.

Nozomi turned to face the robots, and threw a punch!

BOOM! One of the flying robots was destroyed.
BLAM! With a second swift punch, another flying robot was smashed to pieces.

With a flurry of punches, the Smolitzer pulverized the swarm.


[Only one Patrol-Bot now remains, flying away from Nozomi.]

But one robot was trying to get away, and it was to far away for Nozomi to reach! Surely, there was a way to blow up the last one...

Nozomi ran toward the robot, and tried to throw a punch...
but the fist on the Smolitzer's hand started to blast off into the sky!

Another fist popped out of her hand, not even a moment later.
It was a ranged weapon!

Nozomi aimed her fist at the escaping robot, and fired!


[The scene shows the Patrol-Bot being destroyed by the Smolitzer's flying fist.]

KA-POW!! A direct hit onto the flying robot sent it flying towards the ground.

Such power... the Smolitzer could help Nozomi defend herself and find her friends!


[The scene cuts back to the alleyway, now with the Patrol-Bot destroyed.]

Suddenly, Nozomi spotted a few people back in the alleyway...

[The Rapper's Union members appears, with their faces obscured by their hoods again.]

Snoop DoggAy, let's storm this shit. You ready?

ChipI'll be their worst nightmare.

Soulja BoyLet's crank those robots to pieces!

BarkleySLAM!

Snoop DoggOn my lead...! Let's run up on them nigs!

[The scene transitions to the inside of a building, with the Rapper's Union inside.]

Snoop signalled with his hand, and the Rapper's Union proceeded to kick in the door of the other building. The Union moved in and brandished their guns at all the people in the hall.

Snoop DoggGET THE FUCK DOWN! WE'RE TAKIN THIS SHIT, YA HEARD?

Everyone ran outside, screaming. One person stood his ground...

CitizenI remain loyal to the Voice. You will not take over my watch!

He pressed a button, and in the middle of the hall, a hatch opened and ejected a Spheric!

ChipOpen fire!!

The Union focused all of their fire power on the Spheric, but the bullets inflicted minimal damages to its hull at best.

The Spheric changed one of its arms into a gun ad fired off a volley of lasers! The rappers quickly took cover, but one of them was hit!


Soulja BoyDaghh, my wrist!

ChipAy Soulja, you alright?

Soulja BoyI'll be fine. I'm sure I can get a new wrist somewhere around here.

Snoop DoggQuit yappin' and fuckin' shoot that bitch!

BarkleySLAM! JAM!

Barkley tried to throw a basketball at the Spheric, but it bounced off harmlessly.

Snoop DoggYou tried, Barkley, and that's all that matters.

Suddenly, a fist came out of nowhere and clocked the Spheric.
It was Nozomi in the Smolitzer!


Chip...the fuck?!

The Smolitzer ran up to the Spheric and started to bash it to pieces! It was too strong for the Spheric to handle, and soon it was nothing more than a pile of scrap.

The citizen looked on at the Smolitzer, dumbfounded.

CitizenWell, so much for that. AHHHHHHHHHHH!

He quickly ran out of the hall into the streets.

The Rapper's Union cautiously approached the Smolitzer, ready to shoot.


Snoop DoggGuns down, niggas! Guns down. We couldn't do shit to taht thing if it was mad at us anyway.

Snoop noticed Nozomi in the cockpit.

Snoop DoggSup Nozomi?

Nozomi smiled and waved at Snoop. Of course she knew the Rapper's Union: they were colleagues she had worked with in the past.

Snoop DoggYo, thanks fo' savin' our asses out there. Now we got more turf.

ChipBallin' to see you again Nozomi!

Soulja BoyI'd wave too, but my wrist hurts.

BarkleyJAM!

Snoop DoggYo, you wanna join the Rapper's Union? We the best, Khaled's seal of approval. And we're gonna run the city.

Nozomi shook her head. She had a job to do...

Snoop DoggYour loss, nigga. But thanks for the muscle and hustle.

[The scene shows Nozomi exiting the building and waving to Snoop Dogg, who gestures the OK hand sign.]

Nozomi gave one last wave as she piloted the Smolitzer back onto the streets.

Snoop DoggAight niggas, let's pimp our new base out.

ChipCan I bring the interior cr-

Snoop DoggNo.

[Text appears on-screen, reading "TO BE CONTINUED".]

Gallery[]

Trivia[]

  • This is the first appearance of President Haltmann, the Rapper's Union, and the Smolitzer in the series.
    • The alleyway behind the Rapper's Union headquarters has a yellow neon sign with the "To be continued" sign from JoJo's Bizarre Adventure on it.
    • The symbol of the Union is the "OK hand" sign, also known as the Circle Game hand, which is also an in-joke in the SiIvaGunner community. Snoop Dogg makes this sign three times (twice using the same pose), and the symbol is on the Rapper's Union's uniforms.
  • The "loyal citizen"'s sign reads: "NUTSHACK BUT WITH OVERLORD VOICE ENDING ANIME"
  • The line "We the best, Khaled's seal of approval," is a reference to the rapper DJ Khaled's catchphrase "We the best music".
Main
Prologue: "Prologue" • Episode 1: "Seasonal Return" • Episode 2: "No Place To Hide" • Episode 3: "Old Times" • Episode 4: "Will of a Knight" • Episode 5: "Haltmann" • Episode 6: "Advent of Hell" • Episode 7: "Loves the Ladies" • Episode 8: "An Acrimonious Assault" • Episode 9: "Timbre of a Kazoo" • Episode 10: "I Love Her" • Episode 11: "One Last Chance"
Bonus Episodes
"Episode VIII.5 ~A Fragmentary Interlude~" • "[AUDIOLOG: 19:27, HEAD_OFFICE]" • "Bad Moon Rising" • "Wood Man & Robbie Rotten" • "The Lost Rip" • "The Life and Times of Wade L.D." • "Unusual Circumstances" • "I Wanna Thank Me" • "The Disappearance of Wood Man"
Haltmann's Archives
FILE-01: "The Creation of GiIvaSunner" • FILE-02: "Termination" • FILE-03: "The Loudest Store" • FILE-04: "Anomalies, Portals and Fabrications" • FILE-05: "The Werewolf" • FILE-06: "The Supreme Visitor" (Deprecated)FILE-07: "Christmas Spirit" • FILE-08: "Sample" • FILE-09: "Project AIRTH" • FILE-10: "Robotic Usurper" • FILE-11: "The Joke-Explainer™ 7000" • FILE-12: "Albums" • FILE-13: "Mechanizing Occupation Project" • FILE-14: "Retrospective" • FILE-15: "Channel Hosts and Takeovers" • FILE-16: "Garlic-Flavored Tacos" • FILE-17: "The SiIva AI"
Fake / Troll Episodes
"Last Hurrah [FINALE]" • "Large Gains [Episode 7]" (Blooper video) • "The End... - SiIvaGunner: The Video Game" • "Treacherous Addiction [Episode 9]" • "The Final Rip..." ("...of 2017") • "Christmas Spirit [FILE-07] (Beta Mix)" • "Prologue (Beta Mix)" • "Channel Hosts and Takeovers [FILE-15] (Beta Mix)" • "Seasonal Return [Episode 1] (Beta Mix)"
Other
"Credits - SiIvaGunner: King for Another Day" • "The Christmas Comeback Crisis Watchalong" (Announcement) • "Previously on the Christmas Comeback Crisis..." • "...of Season 7"
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